Funny stories

1. LET THEM BURGLE! 

       Mrs. Smith was fond of reminding her husband that the silver was hers, the piano and the furniture was her. In the middle of the night she was awoke by noises downstairs. She shook her husband: ”Henry,” she whispered. ”Get up. There are burglars downstairs.”
      “Burglars,” said Mr. Smith. ”Well, let them burgle! There is nothing of mine down there!”

 2. A BIG DECISION
      A six-year-old boy walked up to his father one day and announced, 'Daddy, I'd like to get married.'
      His father replied hesitantly, 'Sure, son, do you have anyone special in mind?'
     'Yes,' answered the boy. 'I want to marry Grandma.'
     'Now, wait a minute,' said his father. 'You don't think I'd let you get married with my mother, do you?'
     'Why not?' the boy asked. 'You married mine.'

  3. SOAP

       The teacher asked: "John, what are four basic elements in the nature?" 
       John answered: "Teacher, fire, air, soil and.. and.."
              "And what?" the teacher asked. "Try to remember!"
              "And...And...And..."John embarrassed.
              The teacher knew that his pupil couldn't tell the fourth element that is water. Therefore, he gave a hint:" What do you clean your hands by?"
              "Teacher, soap!" John replied.

    4. STRANGE THING
     A French boy said to his friend: "My young sister is ten years old but she can speak English rather well."
     The friend smiled and replied: "It isn't a strange thing. When my family travel to London, I met a little girl who was about five years old but she spoke English like wind."

    5. NOTHING CAN STOP ME
 A naval cadet wrote to his sweetheart:
     "For your sake I’m ready for any exploit! I can swim across the Pacific, brave a part of shark, walk to you under water for miles and miles!"
All that sounded convincing. Then he added:
     "Neither storm or hurricane can stop me!"